Why My House Is Messy but My Heart Is Full: 5 Lessons from My First Year as a Solo Mumtrepreneur
Last year, I leapt from a successful corporate loyalty career into the wild unknown of self-employment. Why? Because having my daughter on my own filled me with indescribable joy and a purpose I couldn’t ignore. I realised that creating a life I truly loved required more than just a vision board—it meant doing the inner work to set boundaries, let go of people-pleasing habits, and become deeply self-aware. It also meant redefining success and building a future that served me and my daughter, not just working long hours for someone else to pay the mortgage.
The very services I now offer in my coaching—like five-year visualisations, designing a purposeful life, and uncovering your authentic self—are exactly what guided me to quit my corporate job. It wasn’t easy, and honestly, some days I still stare at my bank account and question everything. But the transformation is ongoing, and the journey has been worth it.
For solo mums, whether you’re already running a business, thinking about starting one, or considering a side hustle for additional income, here are the biggest lessons I’ve learned in my first year:
1. Marketing Yourself is Like Selling Kale to a Toddler
Years of big-budget marketing didn’t prepare me for promoting myself. I thought I knew what I was doing, but I spent months focused on everything except selling. I made pretty graphics, wrote lengthy blog posts, and even got lost in choosing the perfect font—but I wasn’t clear on how to connect my message to something people actually wanted to buy.
The truth? Failure was my biggest teacher. I realised I had to focus on understanding my audience and creating offers that truly met their needs. Once I stopped trying to do what I thought a business “should” look like and started listening to my community, everything began to shift. I also learned to accept that some things, like keeping a perfectly tidy house, would have to take a backseat. It’s okay if the house is messy sometimes—your energy is better spent building the future you want.
Authenticity became my superpower. Sharing the reality of juggling work, deadlines, and the occasional meltdown while having my daughter "help" me pack orders or join in on video calls made me more relatable. The fails, the funny moments, and the messy in-betweens showed my audience the real me, and that’s what connected us.
Mum Tip: Get your kids involved when you can! Whether it’s them helping you “pack orders” (or pretending to), drawing pictures for your workspace, or just being part of your journey, it’s a great way to show your audience the authenticity of your juggle.
2. You Can’t Do Everything Yourself — Trust Me, I Tried
Solo mums are superheroes, but we’re not superhuman. I thought I could handle it all, from admin to marketing to website design. Spoiler alert: I couldn’t. My first VA lasted... three hours (turns out they support solo mum families, but not those with same-sex parents). 🤦 But then I found incredible experts who transformed my business. Rachel Toyer helped me grow on Instagram, Elle Harrison Design created my stunning new website, and the SheMentors network connected me with inspiring women who provided support and advice.
Mum Tip: Outsourcing isn’t a failure; it’s a strategy. Free up your time for the things that truly matter—like bedtime cuddles or your own self-care. And when life gets overwhelming, don’t hesitate to simplify. For example, I relied on Lite n’ Easy meal deliveries during pressing deadlines so I didn’t have to worry about cooking for a few weeks. Solutions like this can be game-changers.
3. Social Media: The Time-Suck I Should Have Broken Up With
I wasted too much time juggling multiple accounts and chasing followers. The real magic? My email list and existing communities. If I could redo it, I’d nurture relationships where they count and stop worrying about going viral.
Rachel Toyer played a pivotal role in reshaping my Instagram strategy. With her help, I focused on creating authentic, engaging content and connecting with my audience in meaningful ways. Her expertise made the process more streamlined and effective, allowing me to reclaim precious time for other priorities.
Mum Tip: Social media isn’t everything. Set boundaries. Use scheduling tools. Focus on what works and where your people are. Your mental health will thank you.
4. Media Training is Worth Every Awkward Minute
Facing a camera was terrifying. Learning to share my story confidently? Priceless. Media exposure helped me reach women who needed to know that solo motherhood isn’t a compromise—it’s an empowering choice. Huge thanks to Kate Engler, The Publicity Princess, for helping me pitch and connect with journalists.
Mum Tip: Share your story—even if it feels vulnerable. Your journey as a solo mum is powerful; people will connect with and be inspired by your authenticity.
5. Everything You Create is a Marketing Asset
I love the No Need for Prince Charming podcast, my books, and the Solo Mum Society communities. But they’re not just passion projects—they’re marketing tools that lead women to my courses, coaching and resources, where the real impact (and income) happens.
Another hard truth? I spent too long on “pretty procrastination”, like writing a fantastic book and perfecting content that didn’t directly generate anywhere near enough revenue to cover the mortgage. While these projects are meaningful, they must align with your larger goals. Ask yourself: Is this helping my business grow? Or can this wait a few years until you've set up sustainable income streams?
Mum Tip: Think of your creations as part of a bigger puzzle. Whether it’s a blog post, an Instagram reel, or a product, ask yourself: How does this help people find the next step in their journey with me?
But Let’s Talk Wins 🏆
24 solo mums and 29 kids at my first Solo Mum Society Bali retreat.
Almost 2K members in my private Facebook community in a year.
Awards and recognition for my books and community.
The third season of the No Need for Prince Charming podcast.
Empowered women progressing their journey to solo motherhood thanks to my coaching, courses and resources.
And most importantly? A very happy daughter who’s thriving while I’m living the flexible life I dreamed of.
Your Dream Life is Waiting—No Prince Charming Required
If you’re a solo mum or considering this path, know this: You have what it takes to build a life you love. Whether you dream of creating a thriving business, pursuing a passion project, or simply building a life of joy and purpose for you and your kids, it all starts with clarity and inner work.
Working with me will help you uncover your authentic self, break free from people-pleasing habits, and set boundaries that empower you to thrive. Together, we’ll design a future that excites you—one where your dreams and responsibilities as a mum coexist beautifully.
Through tailored coaching sessions, we’ll explore your deepest desires, create a clear roadmap, and turn your vision into reality. This is your chance to build a purposeful life for yourself and your family without waiting for the “perfect” moment.
Now is the time to start exploring what’s possible for you and your family. Don’t wait—your extraordinary future begins here.
Ready to take the first step? Let’s work together to make it happen.
Pro Tip: Lean on experts like myself, Rachel Toyer, Kate Engler, or join communities like SheMentors to fast-track your journey. And remember: You’re never alone.
If you’re a solo mum in business, what are the best/biggest lessons you’ve learned? — your experience might be just what someone else needs to hear.
